When I hear 20-somethings joking about “being old”, I wonder,

What are we subconsciously implying? And how does this affect the way we view our lives?

Perhaps that there are fewer opportunities to have fun? 

Or that there is less time to do and figure out what we want to do with our lives? 

Or that our bodies will never be as healthy and comfortable as they used to be? 

(I promise this has a happy ending)

Along with these thoughts often come feelings of fear, despair, and worries about what the future holds. We think “If things aren’t feeling great now, then what more do I have to look forward to?” 

We conclude that we’re doomed to a life that is less fun and invigorating going forward. 

But this conclusion is a fallacy.

Your brain has an incredible filter in it. Which means that when you tell it to look for information it will find and deliver you results that fit the bill. So when you call yourself old, your brain begins to look for evidence that you are old, and it’s good at finding it. Over time and repetition, it convinces you that you actually ARE kinda old. The belief hardens and strengthens until something that started as a joke begins to feel like a fact.

Instead of thinking and acknowledging.

“I’m getting older, and that feels uncomfortable.”

We come to believe “I am old.”

And some will repeat that belief until they are ACTUALLY old. Like old old.

But what if we’re young?

What if we have a whole lot of time to figure ourselves out? What if we’re in a phase of life where we’ve learned a ton of lessons from childhood and college or a few years in the workforce and now, through trial and error, we have a better understanding of what it is we’re looking for? 

What if we have a better sense of who is worth our time, and what limits we want to set to protect our energy? 

What if all of these things are gems we can use to add to our quality of life as we get older? 

What if the experience we’ve collected thus far only strengthens our ability to locate and enjoy the stuff that is important and meaningful to us?

SURE more responsibility has been added to the mix. But you are stronger and wiser now. You are so much better equipped to navigate this than you would have been 5 or 10 years ago. You’ve grown so much in a positive direction. 

What if you don’t have to feel old, no matter how old you are?

What if you get to play and try new things and meet new people if you want to? What if you can stay curious and find opportunities for fun no matter your age?

And what if growing old isn’t a bad thing?

What if growing old is a privilege? A gift. A blessing.

Right now I’m begging for as much time as I can get with older family members I love, and one day, somebody will feel that way about you too. 

Even if you feel like you’re in a place of just surviving, DAMN that is a beautiful thing. I’m thankful you’re here reading this. I’m thankful you have an opportunity to choose how you want to live and what you want to experience with this time you’ve been given. 

So in a few words…

Dear 20-something,

If you’re starting to feel old, please allow yourself to be young, and enjoy it.

And please get old, and enjoy that too.

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Cheers, 

Morgan Rita Barbret